What do the first moments of being a first time parent feel like? A father’s perspective by Ben A Wise


My heart cracked open.

It’s an indescribable feeling.

One moment we were two, the next we were three.

How does something like that happen? Sure, you find someone, make love, she gets pregnant, her stomach swells, and one day the baby is born.

But there’s a definitive moment when it culminates.

And nothing prepares you for it.

It happened as the sun climbed over the horizon and everything was tinged blue.

My wife had a difficult night. The contractions came on hard and fast. Full intensity—Like our son is now at seven years.

He wants it all and he wants it fast.

No preparation. No transition. Just waves that shook her body without respite, minute after minute.

I saw her metamorphose throughout the night from a timid and fearful woman into a lioness in her full power.

It was awesome and humbling.

I didn’t know what to do. I felt useless. It was so big, so momentous, so charged. I pressed her tailbone and fed her honey and whispered words of encouragement.

She thanked me later.

I was there and I wasn’t there.

Until the end.

We had candles and incense and mantras and a midwife who believed in the sacredness of birth.

It was on a festival day devoted to Ganesha, that whimsical elephant revered for removing obstacles.

When the head emerged and I caught it there was a rupture in my chest.

It’s like you go through life thinking that you know all the emotions you can experience—from sorrow to ecstasy.

But then there was a new one.

I cried.

It was like feeling the poignancy of existence—its sublime strength and pitiful weakness—at the same time. It was like the exultation of creation and the vulnerability of death.

It was witnessing a sentience inhabit a body in a new universe with all of its potentials.

It was like assuming responsibility for the care of something that has never been and will never be.

Singular, come with its million proclivities but also malleable to the stimuli of life and capable of touching others—as it has touched mine—in unique ways.

It shook me like nothing before.

It changed me like nothing before.

And yet it made me more myself than ever.


interpersonal hypnotherapist


As a certified birth and postpartum doula, lactation counselor, and hypnotherapist, I specialize in using Hypnotherapy to enhance the childbirth experience. I offer both in-person and virtual sessions to guide you in connecting with a deep inner state of calm and ease during labor, no matter where you are. My sessions in Soul Connections and Clinical Hypnotherapy are designed to release fear and tension, nurturing a profound, meaningful connection with your baby. With my expertise in Transpersonal Hypnotherapy and Soul Integration, I help you connect with your inner wisdom, empowering you to become a mindful, present, and spiritually aware parent. My holistic approach supports you in cultivating trust and confidence throughout your pregnancy, birth, and beyond.


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